Technology in my household is a unique phenomenon - I've very advanced in some aspects, but others, wow, not even close. Let's talk TV: old school, non-HD, big as Spacey's fore-dome, and the color is juuussst a little off from all my friend's "cool" TV's.
My TV is a parental hand-me-down with years of abuse. Let's just say my situation is pretty embarrassing. My tele was made in the time of VCRs. Not DirecTV, not XBOX, not PS3, not DVD players. My TV was made in the time of Nintendo and coaxial cables, not Monster cables and HD receivers.
Now let's add it all up: TV circa 1995, XBOX 360 owner since Dec. 2008, and DirecTV subscriber since August 2008.
The RED, the WHITE, and the YELLOW - 3 cables that haunt my dreams, raise the hair on my left chest (don't have any on the right), and emotionally slap me in the face.
1. Watch a movie: get up, move tv out from wall, pull out DirecTV cables, insert XBOX cables, switch TV to video mode, plug in XBOX (which shares a plug with my laptop, phone charger, and lamp - why get a power strip? I'm gettin' by), play DVD
2. Realize the E-A-G-L-E-S game is on mid-movie watch: get up - again, move tv out from wall, pull out XBOX cables, insert DirecTv cables, switch back to TV mode, watch game
3. Anyone for some halftime video game fix?: get up, move tv out from wall, pull out DirecTV cables, insert XBOX cables, switch TV to video mode, plug in XBOX, play game
Over a 1.5 hour span, I've moved from couch to tv and back 3 full times, coming on a 4th for the 3rd quarter of the game.
The worst part about my mediocre TV-Cable-Video game sitchu: thinking about all the money I've wasted on Chinese take-out, $50 fedoras, a mind boggling collection of sunglasses, and tequila shots every time I get my full, hatted, glassed, buzzed ass off the couch when, with a little self control and low fruit denial, I'd probably be kicking back with a monster flat screen and an ounce of self respect.
Greg Rose, UMW 2006, My Low Hanging Fruit, created 12/13/09, mediocre paddle tennis player
Monday, December 14, 2009
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and what kind of football fan doesn't realize that his team is playing a conference rival on national television until midway through the game? that's right, a mediocre fan.
ReplyDeleteI also have a mediocre TV.. but as a mediocre television watcher it doesn't bother me as much.
ReplyDeleteWell put by both of you.
ReplyDeletei recently upgraded my mediocre tv to a spectacular tv. the only problem, my mediocre existence was not affected.
ReplyDelete